


When the Bough Breaks

by mcgarrygirl78



Series: Coming Around Again [15]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Drama, F/M, Family, Friendship, Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-06
Updated: 2014-10-06
Packaged: 2018-02-20 02:05:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2410949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcgarrygirl78/pseuds/mcgarrygirl78
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Maybe we need to rehash things; we need to get the poison out.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	When the Bough Breaks

**Author's Note:**

> I’m once again focusing on a possible love triangle. Sometimes they make it so easy.

He had been there before and no matter what it would always cause that sick feeling of dread. Not knowing if she was OK, going over things like the last time they said I love you or shared a kiss. He’d talked to her that afternoon and she said she was feeling under the weather; coming home early. Now he was in another hospital, trying to think of all the reasons this could be happening again.

“Where is she?”

Hotch looked up from his hands and saw Jason. There was devastation on his face but there was something else there as well. Hotch knew him well enough to recognize his rage. Jason Gideon could do Jekyll and Hyde with the best of them. The FBI Unit Chief stood and put his hand on Jason’s shoulder.

“They're going to keep her overnight for observation.” Hotch said.

“The baby’s gone?”

“I'm so sorry, Jason.”

“She lost our child; you were there and I wasn’t.” He said.

“I called you as soon as I could. My first priority was getting Prentiss to the hospital. She was petrified and so was I.”

“You're always there for her, aren’t you Hotch?”

“Prentiss and I work together. We’re friends.” Hotch replied, clearing his throat.

“That’s not what I meant.”

“Well I don’t know what else you could’ve meant, Jason. Maybe you should just go and…”

“It must have been a big boost to your hero complex that she clung to you in her most fearful moments. Without you she would’ve been all alone, even though I was only a phone call away.”

“Sometimes you don’t have time for a phone call.” Hotch replied. “Jason, you're being ridiculous.”

“No, what's ridiculous is that you keep holding on to the slither of hope that Emily may fall in love with you.”

“You're overstepping your bounds.” He came closer to Jason. The two men were practically eye to eye. “You don’t need to be out here arguing with me, you need to be with Emily.” Hotch pointed toward the hospital room. “She needs you now.”

“That’s right, she needs me. She doesn’t need you…you don’t get to be her hero.”

“You're being irrational and I'm not going to take the bait.” Hotch turned away from him. He wasn’t going to listen to that nonsense no matter how much pain Jason was in.

“Am I being so irrational? Tell me there’s no validity to it, Hotch. Tell me to my face that you're not in love with her.”

“Stop it! I cannot believe you're going to pick this fight now. You have some damn nerve.”

“All I know is that you kept me away from Emily when she needed me most so that you could swoop in and save the day.”

“I,” Hotch pointed to himself. “Kept you from Emily? That’s funny, since the last time I checked you were the one who got into your car and drove away. You deserted her and I'm not going to let you blame that on me. The fault is entirely your own.”

“I left, that’s true, but I'm back Hotch. I'm back and Emily and I are together. Stay out of it.”

“Get away from me. I'm not going to fight with you. The last thing Emily needs is to see or hear that.”

“You just stay away from my wife.” Jason turned to walk away but Hotch’s bitter laugh made him look back.

“Your wife, that’s rich Jason. It’s kind of hard for Emily to be your wife when you can't let go of Carolyn. Over twenty years and you just…” His smirk was bitter. “How many of your children will Emily have to lose before you finally give her an engagement ring?”

Hotch didn’t even see the right hook coming. It hit his mouth hard, sent him stumbling back.

“You son of a bitch,” Jason muttered, coming toward him. “You goddamn son of a bitch.”

His eyes were practically black; Hotch could count on one hand the number of times he’d seen his friend that angry. Most of them didn’t end well. Doing his best to plant his feet on the carpet, Hotch went for Gideon’s midsection when he lunged at him. A nurse saw them fighting and alerted security. They were pulling the two of them apart when Natalie arrived. She stared at them both with hard blue eyes.

“What the hell is this?” She asked.

“Jason’s just upset.” Hotch said, trying to click his sore jaw back into place. “It’s nothing, Natalie.”

“Go to your separate corners…now.” She said through clenched teeth. Then she looked at Jason. “What the hell are you thinking? This is the last thing Emily needs right now.”

“I'm sick of everyone telling me what Emily needs.” Jason said, shaking off the security guard. “I know perfectly well what she needs.”

“I can't tell. You're schoolyard scrapping with your best friend in a hospital waiting room.” Nat sighed, putting her hand on his arm. “Take a walk, Jason, get some air. She doesn’t need to see you like this and I know that you know that.”

Jason sighed, nodding. He didn’t say a word or even look at Hotch as he turned and walked down the hall. Natalie turned to Hotch, who crossed his arms and wouldn’t meet her gaze.

“What happened, Aaron?” She asked.

“He’s just angry and feels helpless,” Hotch replied. “He lashed out.”

“I see that. You should probably get your jaw looked at.”

“I'm fine, Nat. It only hurts when I laugh and I surely have no reason to do that right now. You need to go and be with Emily; she shouldn’t be alone right now.”

“I know. I just...”

“You just want to fix things.” Hotch replied.

“Probably,” She smiled a bit. “The three of you are very complicated; this was bound…”

“Please stop,” Hotch’s voice was pained as he held up his hands. “That is the last conversation I want to have right now, or ever really. I think I need to get some air as well. Excuse me.”

Hotch walked away. Natalie watched his back for a while before going to Emily’s room. She hoped she hadn’t heard the ruckus in the waiting room; she was dealing with enough.

***

“You should probably drink this.” Hotch sat down beside Jason on the uncomfortable waiting room couch. He put the cup in front of him on the table.

“What is it?” Jason couldn’t bring himself to look at Hotch.

“Herbal tea…it'll calm your nerves.”

Jason mumbled thanks, sipping the tea. When Hotch put his arm around his shoulder it was hard to hold back the flood of emotion.

“I was completely out of line.” Jason said, holding back his sobs.

“So was I. I think it’s just better if we don’t rehash things.”

“Maybe we need to rehash things; we need to get the poison out.”

Hotch sighed, and then was quiet for a while.

“You may be right,” He said. “But tonight is the wrong time, Jason. Whatever this issue is, it’s our issue and not Emily’s. Right now she needs both of us to be relatively sane. Have you seen her?”

“She was asleep.” Jason replied. “I sat with her for a little while and then came back out here. I didn’t want her to wake up and see me crying. Is your mouth alright?”

“You hit a lot harder than I remember.” Hotch said.

“I was pissed.”

“I wasn’t exactly dancing in the street.”

“Last week Emily told me that she made you her secondary next of kin.” Jason quickly swallowed more tea.

“We’re in the field together…it’s in case anything happens and you can't be there. Jason, I have no intention of stepping on your toes. I did it because Emily asked me to and I knew her reasoning behind it.”

“Who’s your next of kin?” Jason asked.

“Emily…but it was either that or Haley.” That wasn’t completely true but there had been enough trouble tonight. “I should probably go home. I really just wanted to make sure you were alright.”

“I'm…” It was hard to say that he would be alright. Emily had just suffered a second miscarriage. All the agony of losing Daniel and the aftermath fell on Jason like a ton of bricks. He punched Hotch in the mouth; they both said ugly things to each other. After it blew over surely they would blame the pain of the event. Jason knew they both meant every word they said. Every attack, verbal and physical, felt good to both men. “I need to be with Emily.”

Jason stood abruptly, moving away from Hotch. His head was swimming right now. He knew it was possible to love and hate someone with the same intensity. He just never thought it would be Hotch. How could he not also feel hatred toward Emily for bringing them to this impasse or hate himself for his insecurities and walking away in the first place?

“She wakes in the middle of the night sometimes.” He said. “I don’t want her to think that’s she’s alone.”

“Of course.” Hotch nodded, standing up as well. “I'm gonna go home.”

“Goodnight, Hotch,”

Jason turned and walked out of the waiting room. Down the hall in Emily’s hospital room, the lights were dim and she was still asleep. He went in, pulling the curtain across the sliding glass door. Sighing, he pulled the chair up close to the bed and sat down. He leaned his forehead on her hand and cried.

“I'm so sorry, love,” he whispered. “So, so sorry.”

“Shh,” Emily stroked his hair. “Don’t cry, Jace.”

“You shouldn’t be comforting me.” Jason pulled away. He quickly wiped his tears, shaking his head as if to shake off the emotion, and took her hand.

“You shouldn’t be fighting with Hotch.”

“Now is surely not the time to discuss that.”

“I told him not to call you.” She said. “He wanted to as soon as we were leaving Quantico, have you meet us at the hospital, but I said no.”

“Why, Katya? I should've been here with you.”

“I didn’t…at first I didn’t realize I was having a miscarriage. When I did, I was so angry and ashamed. You had to watch me lose Daniel, Jason, it was agony.”

“We are in this together,” Jason laced his fingers through hers. “Your agony is mine and vice-versa. You don’t have to go through anything alone. You don’t have to share your pain with Hotch.” He hadn’t meant to say that but it slipped out. “I'm sorry. Please don’t think I'm upset with you, love, I'm just upset.”

“I'm sorry too.” She kissed their joined hands. “I don’t think I can do this anymore.”

Jason nodded, knowing what she meant.

“I want a baby, Jason; I want a baby so much. I want us to have a family together. My body doesn’t seem to give a damn.”

“I don’t want you hurting yourself anymore.” He replied. “After the doctor lets you out of here I’ll take you home and take care of you. We have time to talk about starting a family. If we want to then we can; there are plenty of ways. For now though, I think you should rest Katya. You need to rest now.”

Emily nodded, closing her eyes. She quickly opened them again.

“Are you and Hotch alright?”

“Katya…”

“He’s your best friend.” She reasoned.

“He’s _your_ best friend.”

“Jason, are you trying to tell me that you don’t love Aaron.”

“I think you need to be resting and not thinking about him. I know you're probably doing it so you won't have to think about this but now is not the time. Love, please rest.”

“Alright,” Emily didn’t want to drop it but he was right. “You're staying, right?”

“I won't move from this chair. I promised you that I wasn’t leaving you again and I meant that. I love you, Katya, with all my heart and soul.”

“I love you too.”

“Sleep love, you need your rest.”

Emily nodded, closing her eyes. Jason was there, he wasn’t leaving, and she felt safe and secure. Still, that didn’t mean sleep would come. She felt empty on the inside; hollow. Emily felt guilty for possibly turning two men who used to be close into enemies. She felt like a failure for not being able to keep another child safe inside of her body. Squeezing Jason’s hand, she opened her eyes.

“I can't sleep.” She said, sniffing away tears.

“You didn’t try very hard.” Jason said gently.

“I need you to hold me, Jason. I just really need to be held right now.”

Jason nodded. He helped her shift in the hospital bed before lying beside her. On his side, Jason pulled her close and held onto her. Emily wrapped her arms around him as she turned on her side. Forehead on his chest, she cried her eyes out. Jason held her tighter, stroking her raven hair, and whispering soft reassurances in her ear. He was crying as well, damning himself for not being strong for her. She rubbed his back and they cried together, holding on. No matter what they were going to hold on.

***

  



End file.
